I used to buy PJ's with pockets so I would never miss a call and sleep with my phone on all night by my bed side table. I use to think that everything had to happen right now. Everything. I have started to set down my long list of things to do next to my phone and what I have found is it brings greater clarity and efficiency to my work.
Whitney Johnson said it well in her HBR article below. Take a few moments and read her article. I, as I know many people, often need this reminder.
Whitney Johnson - Harvard Business Review
Last weekend, like every weekend, I scrawled a long list of things to do on an old envelope. But unlike most weekends, instead of tethering myself to a computer and working, I sat in my backyard alongside my 10 year-old daughter in our collapsible camping chairs, reading novels. I wish I could tell you that this was a bona fide afternoon of rest and relaxation (R&R). Not quite. In flinging aside my agenda, my workaholic self felt more than a little bit naughty. In fact, a more accurate descriptor of that afternoon would have been rebellion — with a little relaxation on the side (R&r).
In this same spirit of rebellion, I've begun docking my phone downstairs, rather than on my nightstand. Now that I'm no longer checking e-mail during the wee hours, I'm sleeping more soundly. Emboldened by this win, I left my phone (which my children call, not entirely in jest, my third child) home during a recent family outing. The bad news is that my 24/7, always-on fortress remains relatively unassailable. Just last night, when it was time for our family's evening prayer, I was so busy tweeting that my husband deadpanned, "What, are you going to tweet your prayer?"
And yet I'm not about to advocate a wholesale disconnect. After all, it's been demonstrated that technology and connectivity do make us happier. But now that we can live life in the cloud, I wonder if there's an ever-present dark cloud of "more-to-do" hanging over our heads, with the languorous, lazy days of summer becoming bygones, and busyness a badge of honor. Do we consider unplugging a necessary evil, a nuisance we would happily do without, rather than recognizing that rest is integral to innovation, and more importantly, to a meaningful life?
According to current neuroscience research, after focusing intently on a project or problem, the brain needs to fully disengage and relax. As composer, musician and producer Brian Eno has opined: "The difficulty of always feeling that you ought to be doing something is that you tend to undervalue the times when you're apparently doing nothing, and those are very important times. It's the time when things get sorted out. If you're constantly awake work-wise you don't allow that to happen." More pithily, as said by John Cleese: "If you are racing around all day, ticking things off lists, looking at your watch, making phone calls, and generally just keeping all the balls in the air, you are not going to have any creative ideas."
When we do nothing (take a walk, a warm shower, slowly wake up), we defy the "always on" mindset, recognizing that we, like our muscles, become more productive by alternating work with rest. As leaders, we can encourage this healthy rebellion by example. We may think we're being responsive, even impressive, when we send work-related e-mails at midnight, on the weekend, or vacation, but those who work for us will see us as establishing a norm. If you will take some real down-time without the constant tug of technology or a to-do list absorbing your thoughts, you will give your employees permission to do the same.
Refraining from constant communication can give your words more weight when you do speak. In the book Sabbath, author Wayne Muller recounts a conversation with Oscar Castro-Neves, an accomplished guitarist and composer for movies, in which Castro-Neves teaches, "It is common in a dramatic scene to gradually bring the music to crescendo, and then stop — rest — silence. Whatever is spoken on the screen in silence is heard more clearly, more powerfully; the words are lent an additional potency, because they are spoken out of silence. When you listen to music, listen to the cadence of rest. Martin Luther King, the most famous speech of his life. Listen to the cadence. Free at last. (Rest) Free at last. (Rest) Thank God almighty, we are free at last."
The most typical dictionary definition of rest is "not moving or tranquil." Another definition is "a thing or place to put something for support." Rest is life and work support. It reinvigorates us so we can get things done. It allows us to subvert our inner workaholic, liberating our innovative self. It also allows us pause to gain perspective, to plumb the meaning of our life.
What we think and do today makes meaning of what we did yesterday. Learn to lie dormant. Listen to your cadence of rest. Take a break.
Only after a break can you have a breakthrough.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Healthy Relationships Are Like The Best Tasting Tomatoes
Sports fans know this chant between two sections of the stadium:
"What do we want?" The other side yells, "A victory."
"When do we want it?" "Now!"
We all want what we want now. We don't want to wait. We are in rush. Time is money -- and all that.
Today I am asking us to take it back a notch or more. Because we don't have to have everything all at once.
Say that with me: We don't have to have everything all at once.
That may not sound like me, because by now you know, I talk and move a mile a minute. Fast is my normal speed. But, I don't rush all the time (especially when I go for a run). I take my time when I need to, and I need to more than you probably think. I slow down because it is in my best interest to do so.
Let me explain. I have recruited hundreds of the best athletes, coaches and broadcasters in the world, and beat out the competition in doing so. Go fishing and there will always be more fish than people who want to catch them. Not so in the athlete representation business. There are more agents than athletes.
So what I saw early on was a lot of jostling, a lot of pushing, a lot of the "Jerry McGuire" scenes of working against some imaginary clock to sign someone, to nail the deal, to get so wound up it just has to happen, or bust.
Yuck.
Early on, I got clarity around the fact that it doesn't happen all at once. I needed to create a connection and that takes time. Without a true connection, a true relationship would never happen.
Deep down, when I saw this pace of competition around me, when I took a step back to put myself in the shoes of those I was pursuing, this really crystallized: I hate being rushed. I believe most people do. In sales -- and that's a big part of athlete representation at the core -- when we rush, the other party feels like we have something to hide. In that moment there is a real risk of being seen as a user or insincere. We're just trying to get the deal done so we can sit back and let their money roll in. Not cool.
Think about that from the other person's view. Doesn't feel good. Right.
Rushing can sometimes close deals, I'll say that -- but rushing never, ever builds a relationship.
In a relationship, the opposite is true: Haste makes waste.
OK, so pause for a minute while I clarify what may seem like a contradiction to you. When I say that you don't need everything all at once, I need to make something clear: We still need to be urgent about building the relationship. This is the key difference: focusing our urgency on the relationship, not on the transaction. What I want to get us moving toward is adding value to them with urgency.... and moving away from any rush to add value to ourselves. Do you see how big that difference is?
A transaction is like one ordinary plant -- a relationship is a garden full of precious, valuable plants. The plants don't grow overnight, especially the ones that have really deep roots. We've got to be patient and let those roots take hold, and then we can count on knowing we'll have a really strong plant.....a flower or a bush or tree that will weather the worst storms and drought. That's the kind of strong relationships we want, too.
There are countless examples in nature, all around us, of living things that cannot be rushed. Take something common like a tomato. These are grown in hothouses so they'll be ready to ship quickly. They don't taste as good as a tomato from a garden. People don't rush out to get tomatoes from a greenhouse. No question, if you want a truly tasty tomato, we're looking on the roadside for the shack with heirloom tomatoes nurtured with sunlight and water. That's going to taste really good.
And so, as it's been said for centuries: there is a time for everything, and paying attention to your pace is critical. Realizing that what we want doesn't have to happen all at once is at the core of this thought from Maya Angelou, the great writer:
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
It is hard to make someone feel important, and genuinely special, if we rush. Why is slowing down in this regard so important? My goal for us is not to land one deal. It is to land multiple, ongoing deals with a core group of customers who see us not as sales people but as people who add value to their lives. People they cannot live without.
Bottom line is, a good relationship takes time. Anything authentic involves time. When we talk about building a platform that's a place that must be strong, thus you don't expect it to be built overnight. If that happened, the platform would be shaky, wouldn't it? We'd worry about it collapsing and hurting anyone who was counting on it for support, maybe even injuring ourselves.
There are hidden powers in slowing down: For starters, this habit requires confidence, and it builds confidence. If you are confident in what you do and how you do it, you will refrain from forcing it. If you are not as confident as you'd like to be in what you do and how you do it, you can start mastering that mindset by slowing down. Slowing down gives you the room to set one's self up to act "as if." Acting as if I already have someone's business before I do is my way of practicing and rehearsing for the big show. Because I know that I don't have to have it all at once, I have given myself time and space for authenticity. We only control yourselves, and we must wait for another party to connect, so why not let it flow?
Another reason to slow down is to create leverage. When the other side sees our urgency, they wonder, "Are they hiding something? Something up their sleeve?" They sense it and close down. They're having post-trauma from being burned, from being sold, from being pushed too close before they are ready.
Grow relationships like we grow tomatoes in our backyard garden not the hothouse.
"What do we want?" The other side yells, "A victory."
"When do we want it?" "Now!"
We all want what we want now. We don't want to wait. We are in rush. Time is money -- and all that.
Today I am asking us to take it back a notch or more. Because we don't have to have everything all at once.
Say that with me: We don't have to have everything all at once.
That may not sound like me, because by now you know, I talk and move a mile a minute. Fast is my normal speed. But, I don't rush all the time (especially when I go for a run). I take my time when I need to, and I need to more than you probably think. I slow down because it is in my best interest to do so.
Let me explain. I have recruited hundreds of the best athletes, coaches and broadcasters in the world, and beat out the competition in doing so. Go fishing and there will always be more fish than people who want to catch them. Not so in the athlete representation business. There are more agents than athletes.
So what I saw early on was a lot of jostling, a lot of pushing, a lot of the "Jerry McGuire" scenes of working against some imaginary clock to sign someone, to nail the deal, to get so wound up it just has to happen, or bust.
Yuck.
Early on, I got clarity around the fact that it doesn't happen all at once. I needed to create a connection and that takes time. Without a true connection, a true relationship would never happen.
Deep down, when I saw this pace of competition around me, when I took a step back to put myself in the shoes of those I was pursuing, this really crystallized: I hate being rushed. I believe most people do. In sales -- and that's a big part of athlete representation at the core -- when we rush, the other party feels like we have something to hide. In that moment there is a real risk of being seen as a user or insincere. We're just trying to get the deal done so we can sit back and let their money roll in. Not cool.
Think about that from the other person's view. Doesn't feel good. Right.
Rushing can sometimes close deals, I'll say that -- but rushing never, ever builds a relationship.
In a relationship, the opposite is true: Haste makes waste.
OK, so pause for a minute while I clarify what may seem like a contradiction to you. When I say that you don't need everything all at once, I need to make something clear: We still need to be urgent about building the relationship. This is the key difference: focusing our urgency on the relationship, not on the transaction. What I want to get us moving toward is adding value to them with urgency.... and moving away from any rush to add value to ourselves. Do you see how big that difference is?
A transaction is like one ordinary plant -- a relationship is a garden full of precious, valuable plants. The plants don't grow overnight, especially the ones that have really deep roots. We've got to be patient and let those roots take hold, and then we can count on knowing we'll have a really strong plant.....a flower or a bush or tree that will weather the worst storms and drought. That's the kind of strong relationships we want, too.
There are countless examples in nature, all around us, of living things that cannot be rushed. Take something common like a tomato. These are grown in hothouses so they'll be ready to ship quickly. They don't taste as good as a tomato from a garden. People don't rush out to get tomatoes from a greenhouse. No question, if you want a truly tasty tomato, we're looking on the roadside for the shack with heirloom tomatoes nurtured with sunlight and water. That's going to taste really good.
And so, as it's been said for centuries: there is a time for everything, and paying attention to your pace is critical. Realizing that what we want doesn't have to happen all at once is at the core of this thought from Maya Angelou, the great writer:
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."
It is hard to make someone feel important, and genuinely special, if we rush. Why is slowing down in this regard so important? My goal for us is not to land one deal. It is to land multiple, ongoing deals with a core group of customers who see us not as sales people but as people who add value to their lives. People they cannot live without.
Bottom line is, a good relationship takes time. Anything authentic involves time. When we talk about building a platform that's a place that must be strong, thus you don't expect it to be built overnight. If that happened, the platform would be shaky, wouldn't it? We'd worry about it collapsing and hurting anyone who was counting on it for support, maybe even injuring ourselves.
There are hidden powers in slowing down: For starters, this habit requires confidence, and it builds confidence. If you are confident in what you do and how you do it, you will refrain from forcing it. If you are not as confident as you'd like to be in what you do and how you do it, you can start mastering that mindset by slowing down. Slowing down gives you the room to set one's self up to act "as if." Acting as if I already have someone's business before I do is my way of practicing and rehearsing for the big show. Because I know that I don't have to have it all at once, I have given myself time and space for authenticity. We only control yourselves, and we must wait for another party to connect, so why not let it flow?
Another reason to slow down is to create leverage. When the other side sees our urgency, they wonder, "Are they hiding something? Something up their sleeve?" They sense it and close down. They're having post-trauma from being burned, from being sold, from being pushed too close before they are ready.
Grow relationships like we grow tomatoes in our backyard garden not the hothouse.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Sheryl Sandberg: Why we have too few women leaders | Video on TED.com
I have watched this talk twice, as I do with many Ted Talks. Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook, has three great points in her talk about what she believes is important for women to be aware of to be leaders in the work force:
1. Sit at the table
2. Make your partner a real partner
3. Don't leave before you leave
Listen for the story of her brother and his reaction to how he did on a college exam. Capture this, own it, implement it. I promise, believing you can (as I often say) 'crush it' is paramount to success.
Sheryl Sandberg: Why we have too few women leaders | Video on TED.com
1. Sit at the table
2. Make your partner a real partner
3. Don't leave before you leave
Listen for the story of her brother and his reaction to how he did on a college exam. Capture this, own it, implement it. I promise, believing you can (as I often say) 'crush it' is paramount to success.
Sheryl Sandberg: Why we have too few women leaders | Video on TED.com
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Jeff Bezos: What matters more than your talents | Video on TED.com
Whether you are old or young, just starting or just finishing, watch this - please - it will make you think and make you reflect. Enjoy.
Jeff Bezos: What matters more than your talents | Video on TED.com
Jeff Bezos: What matters more than your talents | Video on TED.com
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Business of Best, Invest in Ethics
Strong marketing and advertising plan? Check. Front and center product placement? Check. Good cash flow? Got it. Employees that work hard and understand your vision? You betcha. Unwavering ethics and solid underlying principles guiding your business? Wait just a second.
Across the business world, there is a general focus on the product, the plan, and the business. Most managers and CEO’s feel if we have a good product, a smart plan, and a quality business, we will inevitably succeed and achieve dividends for our stakeholders.
But the power of investing in good business ethics cannot be understated. Great companies have strong visions and ethical practices. They give back, remain focused on the customer, and do not cut corners at the expense of society as a whole. The platform that successful businesses have is compelling and influential. They have the medium to reach people and make a difference in society as a whole.
In general, people want to do business with companies that have a positive influence and quality morals. At the end of the day, we are who we do business with. If a company is found to be unethical or dishonest, it may never recover. We never want to be stuck on that sinking ship because it will go down quickly and be forgotten forever. Good businesses build success through strong ethical considerations. One way is by giving back to the community. A strong business understands the concept that when we uplift the surrounding community, we uplift our company. The late Ray Anderson of Interface is a perfect example of this mentality.
Good ethics come in many different shapes and sizes, and shine a light on the same general values. It can be the company that supports the local community, the one that is a good steward of the environment, the one that backs numerous philanthropic endeavors, or even the one that is honest and forthcoming with the general public, and focuses on morals and principles, not just dollars and cents.
Far too often businesses forget to value the vitality of ethics. They sweep them under the rug, or focus little time or energy on them. Our vision and morals should be just as clear to consumers as our products. Think Apple and Steve Jobs as the ultimate example of communicating “vision and morals”. Think Chick-fil-A--they do more business in six days than most of their competitors do in seven days. Not only do customers enjoy their product, but they are also catapulted by their clearly articulated ethics and vision. People should not only know what we sell or offer, but also, what we believe in and what kind of character we have. When value propositions are equal, clients and consumers will do business with those that they respect, relate to, and admire.
We are all in the business of being the best and it is crucial to implement strong ethics and morals to help maximize success. As our business grows, so will the opportunity and the platform to infuse our environment with quality ethics. Sometimes it costs more and takes more time to do the right thing, but the time and money will pale in comparison if people do not trust our business or if you are caught doing the wrong thing. I always say their are similarities in the way we should grow our businesses and the way we raise our children. Teach right from wrong, instill fundamental ethics that are relatable, promote honesty and integrity, and educate on values, character and morals. Once we take those steps, we will notice changes. Our business will blossom and grow, consumers will be more welcoming and embrace our brand, and we will inevitably see greater success.
Ethics and being in the business of the best go hand in hand.
Across the business world, there is a general focus on the product, the plan, and the business. Most managers and CEO’s feel if we have a good product, a smart plan, and a quality business, we will inevitably succeed and achieve dividends for our stakeholders.
But the power of investing in good business ethics cannot be understated. Great companies have strong visions and ethical practices. They give back, remain focused on the customer, and do not cut corners at the expense of society as a whole. The platform that successful businesses have is compelling and influential. They have the medium to reach people and make a difference in society as a whole.
In general, people want to do business with companies that have a positive influence and quality morals. At the end of the day, we are who we do business with. If a company is found to be unethical or dishonest, it may never recover. We never want to be stuck on that sinking ship because it will go down quickly and be forgotten forever. Good businesses build success through strong ethical considerations. One way is by giving back to the community. A strong business understands the concept that when we uplift the surrounding community, we uplift our company. The late Ray Anderson of Interface is a perfect example of this mentality.
Good ethics come in many different shapes and sizes, and shine a light on the same general values. It can be the company that supports the local community, the one that is a good steward of the environment, the one that backs numerous philanthropic endeavors, or even the one that is honest and forthcoming with the general public, and focuses on morals and principles, not just dollars and cents.
Far too often businesses forget to value the vitality of ethics. They sweep them under the rug, or focus little time or energy on them. Our vision and morals should be just as clear to consumers as our products. Think Apple and Steve Jobs as the ultimate example of communicating “vision and morals”. Think Chick-fil-A--they do more business in six days than most of their competitors do in seven days. Not only do customers enjoy their product, but they are also catapulted by their clearly articulated ethics and vision. People should not only know what we sell or offer, but also, what we believe in and what kind of character we have. When value propositions are equal, clients and consumers will do business with those that they respect, relate to, and admire.
We are all in the business of being the best and it is crucial to implement strong ethics and morals to help maximize success. As our business grows, so will the opportunity and the platform to infuse our environment with quality ethics. Sometimes it costs more and takes more time to do the right thing, but the time and money will pale in comparison if people do not trust our business or if you are caught doing the wrong thing. I always say their are similarities in the way we should grow our businesses and the way we raise our children. Teach right from wrong, instill fundamental ethics that are relatable, promote honesty and integrity, and educate on values, character and morals. Once we take those steps, we will notice changes. Our business will blossom and grow, consumers will be more welcoming and embrace our brand, and we will inevitably see greater success.
Ethics and being in the business of the best go hand in hand.
Saturday, September 3, 2011
The Journey, Not the Destination
Picture this. We get into our car, close the door, and buckle our seatbelt. We turn on the ignition, hearing the engine come to life after sleeping all night long. Next we check our mirrors, turn on the radio, and open our garage door. We are ready to go to our destination. After pausing for a second, we consider that while we know where we are doing, we are unsure how to get there. So we type in the address into our navigation, and we begin to hear the guiding voice, directing we to our location. As we travel to our destination, we think little of the directions or the journey. We simply hope to get there in a timely manner, and do not consider the path we will take. In fact, we just listen to the technologically created voice, guiding we along our way. We are focused on the destination, caring little for the journey to get there.
Many people run their businesses in the same manner. They take the time to prepare for the destination, planning ahead and strategically checking their mirrors, their seatbelts, and confirming the address. But once they get going, they pay little attention to the journey, the pathway to the final destination. But through my experience as a negotiator and businesswoman, I have found that the journey can be more important than where we are actually trying to go. The learning, the education, and the experience occur during the journey, not when we arrive at the destination.
The old saying is the end justifies the mean, but so many times, the mean is really where the opportunity falls. Some of the greatest learning experiences have come through the voyage to the target. Think about how many times we have set a goal and have failed to reach it. It happens to all of us. With life comes great success and great failure, fantastic highs and sometimes lows. But even in failure, there is an opportunity to learn. If we consider the journey and focus on what happens along the way, we may learn the most valuable lessons of them all. Rarely do we learn life-changing lessons in success. But in failure comes teaching moments. And how we implement this education into our own business practices can be the difference between hitting a home run or striking out the next time around.
Through negotiating hundred of millions of dollars in contracts for professional athletes, there are times when my players got the contract of their dreams, and other times when we are left wanting more because of the nature of the business (ie injuries, age, challenging season). But in those times, even though we did not reach our desired destination, I studied why we fell short and focused on the journey as a learning experience.
In the realm of business, a journey will come in many different shapes and sizes. It could be in the form of launching a new product, or attempting to reposition an existing product, or pitching to a new client, or marketing for an old one. Regardless of the journey it is vital to spend time evaluating the path we or our company took to reach any destination. Because this is what the best businessmen and woman do. To be the best, we have to evaluate like the best do. Whether I succeed or fail, after each journey, I spend time reflecting and ask myself the following vital questions:
1. Was there a quicker and more efficient way to reach the same result?
2. Did I exhaust all of the resources I have in order to effectuate my goal in a positive manner?
3. Did my company or business benefit from this experience? If not, why and what could I do different the next time?
4. What lessons have I learned from the journey?
By answering each of these four questions after every business opportunity and experience, we will obtain a more insightful understanding of how we get where we are today. This reflection is something many people do not take the time to do, but the best businesses, companies, and leaders spend just as much time studying their journey as they do their destination. Through evaluating our path, we will learn from our mistakes, and find better ways to implement a more efficient and effective manner of reaching our destination the next time. So take time and consider not only where we are going, but also how we will get there—because we never know, sometimes the mean justifies the end.
Many people run their businesses in the same manner. They take the time to prepare for the destination, planning ahead and strategically checking their mirrors, their seatbelts, and confirming the address. But once they get going, they pay little attention to the journey, the pathway to the final destination. But through my experience as a negotiator and businesswoman, I have found that the journey can be more important than where we are actually trying to go. The learning, the education, and the experience occur during the journey, not when we arrive at the destination.
The old saying is the end justifies the mean, but so many times, the mean is really where the opportunity falls. Some of the greatest learning experiences have come through the voyage to the target. Think about how many times we have set a goal and have failed to reach it. It happens to all of us. With life comes great success and great failure, fantastic highs and sometimes lows. But even in failure, there is an opportunity to learn. If we consider the journey and focus on what happens along the way, we may learn the most valuable lessons of them all. Rarely do we learn life-changing lessons in success. But in failure comes teaching moments. And how we implement this education into our own business practices can be the difference between hitting a home run or striking out the next time around.
Through negotiating hundred of millions of dollars in contracts for professional athletes, there are times when my players got the contract of their dreams, and other times when we are left wanting more because of the nature of the business (ie injuries, age, challenging season). But in those times, even though we did not reach our desired destination, I studied why we fell short and focused on the journey as a learning experience.
In the realm of business, a journey will come in many different shapes and sizes. It could be in the form of launching a new product, or attempting to reposition an existing product, or pitching to a new client, or marketing for an old one. Regardless of the journey it is vital to spend time evaluating the path we or our company took to reach any destination. Because this is what the best businessmen and woman do. To be the best, we have to evaluate like the best do. Whether I succeed or fail, after each journey, I spend time reflecting and ask myself the following vital questions:
1. Was there a quicker and more efficient way to reach the same result?
2. Did I exhaust all of the resources I have in order to effectuate my goal in a positive manner?
3. Did my company or business benefit from this experience? If not, why and what could I do different the next time?
4. What lessons have I learned from the journey?
By answering each of these four questions after every business opportunity and experience, we will obtain a more insightful understanding of how we get where we are today. This reflection is something many people do not take the time to do, but the best businesses, companies, and leaders spend just as much time studying their journey as they do their destination. Through evaluating our path, we will learn from our mistakes, and find better ways to implement a more efficient and effective manner of reaching our destination the next time. So take time and consider not only where we are going, but also how we will get there—because we never know, sometimes the mean justifies the end.
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